Blog About a Vlog!
So, I’d been invited into town for the launch of something
to do with guys, film and food. My
instruction was to go along to The Wee Guys after closing. There was a video to be made of an ‘event’. I must have really had my wires, legs, brain
cells and everything else crossed because I thought it was for a speed dating,
keys on the table type of thing.
Guy Cowan had been talking about ‘themed’ dinner parties and,
although it all sounded a bit dodgy, he assured me the first ‘film’ would simply
be an introduction to the hedonism that was to follow. I had nothing to worry about. There’s no way I’d ever be involved in
anything other than straight one on one action but I was willing to help out a friend, especially if it also involved
food!
I’ve had less than my fair share of exploits with men but if
I was looking it would obviously be
for something very basic. Truth be told ladies,
it’s about all you can hope for. My past
two (I know, I’m a minimalist) relationships have been like a list from Snow
White and the seven dwarfs rolled in to two fully grown males. Between them, starting at the top end, I’ve
had Exotic, Gorgeous, Charming and Tolerable.
Then after a very, long, dry, spell I woke up with Heedless, Narcissist
and Chancer!
So, although I wasn’t holding out much hope and wasn’t that
bothered, I thought, there’s no harm in giving it a go, whatever it was!
When I arrived, both Clair and Guy had cameras. This worried me a tad but there was no one
else there and, even in a fight, I could take these two on, no bother. Clair then informed me that I had not, in
fact, been his first choice and he’d already had asked her and she’d given him
a categorical…NO!
Cameras starts rolling and I start to spurt out with my best
spiel;
“I’m looking for someone part-time, preferably not stupid
and able to hold a conversation that doesn’t involve short sentences that all
end with the same question!
“It’s good in’t it…right good?”
(That is actually a statement stupit. He's still waiting for an answer!)
(That is actually a statement stupit. He's still waiting for an answer!)
He should have his own place, a job, and not want to see me
any more than twice a week. I would not wish to meet any of his family or
friends as I wouldn’t want people to know. Also, it’s always difficult to break
up with them (the friends and family that is) when things go awry; which they
inevitably would.”
At this point they decide the cameras are working fine and
explain that they are moving on to film Guy, making me lunch. Simple as that…food, no guys involved
whatsoever. Not sure whether I’m angry
at them for taking the piss or sorry that it’s not, in fact, something a bit
more sordid. I know I said I wasn’t
interested but I had actually worn matching underwear and epilated.
After those two had, basically, taken the Michael right out
of me, (that made me giggle) I was thunderstruck at the prospect of eating
actual food, made from scratch, by this wonderfully talented, hedonistic and
culinary genius.
His blog; A Guy For All Seasons was introduced a few weeks
ago and the official launch will be on August 10th. You can enter the competition for tickets on
the link below!
In his blog Guy will be writing restaurant reviews from his
travels both in Scotland and abroad.
There ‘will be recipes, food, cookery shopping trips and advice on
knives, pots, stoves and other kitchen and dining room related items’.
He will also probably harp on about how he hobnobs with the
stars and all that shit. I would ask the question; If he knows all these famous
people and kicks about with them then why had he asked me to do his first
vlog?
I think he talks a load of
bollocks to tell you the truth but at least I’m getting a free lunch.
However, lunch was sublime!
Homemade tagliatelle made using Italian eggs (He uses these
because of the rich orange color of the Yokes) and the most flavorsome, rich
red tomatoes flown in from Sarti’s in Newton Mearns that very morning.
To watch this Guy at work was a truly erotic, gastronomic experience
and the fact that every moment was being filmed had me quite hot under my polo
neck sweater.
You know what? I
think my connection with food is better than any relationship I could possibly
have. My partnership with food has been
constant. From my first sexy, Italian one
which was a very rich and fulfilling to my most recent cheap and cheerful,
Scottish fish and chips liaison. I’m
sure that food might be my greatest and most enduring passion.
For the time being anyway.
Oh…and Guy.
Best chef in Planet Glasgow!
See you the next time!
Glasgow Girl!
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