The Butterfly and The Pig

The Butterfly and The Pig 

So, The Mary and I are off to The Butterfly and the Pig in Shawlands tonight.  I’d like to say I’m the one fluttering about and The Mary is trotting along but she might be a bit miffed and start grunting... and we all know what that’s like!

However,  The Mary was as happy as a pig in shit when I said we were going South and she seemed to think it might be warmer than Carntyne.  I'm not saying anything till we get there; best to keep her sweet, you know, to save my bacon and that. 

The Butterfly and the Pig is situated on the Southside of the river and opened in January 2015. (It used to be the iconic Corona Bar) Its shabby chic interior and quirky menus are similar to its Bath Street, sister venue and it feels like stepping back in time; which really suits The Mary’s retro attire the night.  

It actually reminded me of a previous life when I worked for a madam who lived on Monteith Row at the Glasgow Green.  A few of the girls and I used to do business on Fleshers’ Haugh.  Those were the days and after a hard couple of hours graft we would return to the auld girls’s parlour for supper.  She was an acerbic, old tart but we all depended on her for expertise.  

I called myself Nelly Sinful and now and again I get flashbacks of bouncing about in the back of a horse and carriage bumping over the grass in the Green!  It was such fun and financially fruitful!

The Mary was surprised when I told her this because she thinks I’m a cynical old swine and don’t believe in the here or thereafter.  Next time I would like to come back as a palaeontologist because I already have a vast knowledge of old fossils.    

Anyway, The Butterfly and the Pig provides diners with traditional Scottish breakfasts, afternoon and high teas but also offers a wide choice of hearty meals made to traditional recipes using local fresh ingredients. From everyone’s favourites; burgers, fish and chips to more special dishes of the day such as lamb cutlets or haggis the restaurant is open throughout the day, seven days a week.

It’s also very family, dog and well, generally just very friendly.  So they say, but, we’ll be the judges of that!  Talking about pets, I did think about taking my Wee Cicca out for an airing tonight but she's worn out just now, you know, with all the activity going on at mine; me having a gentleman caller and that.

On entry, we are delighted with the shabby chic interior, its mismatched furniture and vintage wallpaper but suddenly The Mary started having flashbacks to her house in Riddrie and I have to calm her right down with a diet coke to stop her heaving and sweating like a pig.

Then the two little pigs were approached by the beautiful butterfly named Melissa who served us. She was absolutley delightful! With her fresh-faced looks, beautiful blonde hair and gorgeous figure I swear I could have…!  

I'm right frisky these days....

There were so many delicious things on the menu neither of us could settle for one and we ordered things to share.  When we explained this to the gorgeous Melissa she moved us to a bigger table in order to make us more comfortable.  It was such a big table I thought it was another surprise for my Birthday and kept watching the door till The Mary punched me on the side of the head and told me not to be so stupid and that I was a spoiled, wee swine!

The Butterfly and the Pig takes pride in producing everything they make from scratch and are famous for their quirky menus and this was spot on.  Although we had to wait about 15 minutes for the food it was more than worth it.   

We shared the ‘Tittys traditional fish and chips, battered to death haddock wi’ mushy peas (all veggies beware they have nasty ham through the peees) and a slice of lemon. (Please be careful there may be one or two bones in the fish they had to move about you know) 10pounds 50pence)’ and the ‘Veggie frittata, like an omelette but not quite, done in a pan served with a side salad’ a pure bargain at 9 bucksamondo! Every single bit was devoured and The Mary and I were so ecstatic that her snorting and slavering didn’t even annoy me for once.

We were so full that we decided we wouldn't have any dessert.  Then the stupendous Melissa came fluttering back over and asked us if we would like something sweet.  I went into a sort of trance and found myself ordering the Lime and Coconut cheesecake with a cookie base.  

That’s how mesmerising that lassie actually is.

The Mary and I whimpered and dribbled at every mouthful.  The experience was heavenly and we never wanted to leave.  It was very relaxing and the time passed so quickly that The Mary wanted to stay for breakfast and I had to explain that she had responsibilities and we’d have to leave.  

On the way out The Mary was teary eyed as she looked over at what she thought was her Granny’s living room and I promised her we would come back very soon…and we will!

Very soon.

See you the next time 

  Melissa Lycaeides    

Mx

Nakodar Grill

Nakodar Grill

So, never thinking for a moment The Mary would take it literally, I asked her, not, to help me with Maximilian, my grandson, when we got to the restaurant.  As I got out of the car she lit her fag as I struggled to get the pram out of my tiny boot.  I looked across at her and she smiled, a sort of Mona Cheeky smile.  I thought, ‘I’ll show her’ my technical skills and got the pram upright in jig time, after falling over and dropping my bag, gloves and car key.

I then went round to the door to get the baby out of the car and noticed the pram rolling down the hill and what did she do?   She smiled over at me and pointed towards the runaway perambulator stating I'd forgot to put the brake on.  Her smile seemed to be more obvious at this point, like the Mona effeing Lisa when viewed at a distance.  I was actually thinking her lips might be more prominent if she disnae hurry up and help me! 

Needless to say The Mary was delighted when I had to ask her to help me unlock the child from the car seat.   Not so smart later though when she phoned me and said that when I dropped her off she had taken the wean by mistake and didn’t realise until she went to put him into a bed in the dormitory and it was already occupied.   

This evening we are going to Nakodar which is an exquisite Indian Restaurant in Midtown East End and situated in an 18^th Century town house on Annfield Place just off Duke street.

“Nakodar is committed to producing he finest quality and most nutritious Indian food using fresh and natural ingredients, cooked in a bespoke tandoori oven (one of only two of its kind in Scotland) and with over 25 years of family experience’ I can assure you they have hit the jackpot in both location and clientele with a love of Indian Cuisine.

Named after a city in India you almost feel transported there when you enter the ‘Gate of Goodness’ and smell the aroma of the spices and feel the warmth of the oven and openness of the ‘sala’.  This was very important to me and The Mary because of the fact we had the child in the hazardous, wean vehicle.  My driving wisnae very good as I am 30 years out of practice and these new-fangled things are awfie twirly.

They asked if we needed a high chair and I declined because it had taken me 20 minutes to get Lord Max into the bloody thing in the first place so I pretended to him that I had made a fort and, like Sardar Tara Singh Ghaiba, he was the master of the surroundings.

Tony our server was very handsome and efficient and I ordered the Lamb Karachi and The Mary had the Buttered Chicken Masala. We shared a Nan bread and rice.  I have to say that is was the most delicious, succulent and tender meat I have tasted since I kissed wee Max for the first time.  Then I looked up at The Mary and she looked sort of delirious so I didn’t want to disturb her by asking how she enjoyed hers as her eyes were rolling and she was drooling.  

That said it all really!

Finishing off with an Americano with hot milk and a Decapitated Lassie for the The Mary we set off home in an extremelly zesty, spicy and very saucy mood!  A rare night was had by all and I cannot wait to go back and get pure spiced up again…soon!

So, like John, the purveyor, who visualised this restaurant for a very long time, if you have a dream go after it and make it come true.  Good things happen to those who wait.

By the way, Maximilian is still at The Mary’s and Sarah is going to pick him up before she leaves on Saturday.

Till the next time

Mx

Kastriot's Mediterranean Bar and Grill!

Kastriot's Mediterranean Bar and Grill

The Mary and I have often discussed the lack of classy eating joints on the Upper East Side of The River and to tell you the truth, I didn’t want to say that if there were any, I’d probably wouldn't go with her.   However, due to us travelling further afield recently and our visit to the fabulous Celino’s in the East she has gained some etiquette skills and can even order her own coffee without shocking or frightening the staff with decapitation.  The Mary’s favorite tipple, as you all know, is a “Decapitated Lassie.” 

Why would you keep drinking something that you can’t say?

So today when I met The Mary for coffee and she let me see her cocktail dress for the night.  Well, I didn’t know what to say.  It was very fancy with lace, sequins and a bit of chiffon thrown in.  I had to explain; although it was Halloween, we were not going out in fancy dress and we were staying in the East End.  She looked a wee bit upset until I explained that the weans will be over in Giffnock and I had, at last , found another, really classy joint in the area.

So, tonight we’re off to a smashing eatery in Baillieston; a former mining town which is now classed as a residential area and The Mary is pure buzzin' that there’s a new Gaff practically on her doorstep. 

Kastriots Mediterranean Bar and Grill is on the Main Street and no matter what happens my expectation is to be entertained by my very funny, mad pal, eat some good food and soak in the atmosphere of the Upper East Side in my fabulously cosmopolitan Glasgow Town!

When we arrived and were greeted by the very charming Stephen I had such a good feeling about the place.  The atmosphere was very cosy and inviting.  He then showed us to a booth and me and Mary were well chuffed because we love a wee tabernacle. There we are able to rid ourselves of all the weight of the previous week.  So, I must confess, it was a fantastic start to the evening. 

I am a pure foody and take ages to order but then, all of a sudden, The Mary pipes up that she’s going to do the ordering and I was like; “Hey you, wit’s guan oan?”  She’s getting far too confident with  all this going out carry-on.  Ordering for me indeed!  Then she strikes up with, “When I lived in Greece,” Well, I’ll be damned.  Thinking she was talking a load of Baklava I asked her to haud oan and explain.  No way, was she treating me like some sort of ‘cretan dakos’ and so the rest of the orthodox confessional began.

Seemingly, when I lived in Italy, The Mary couldn’t stand being in Glasgow without me so, she got on a banana boat down at the Clyde side and asked how far it would take her for 45 quid. She landed in Greece and got a job there until she knew for certain I was on my way back before returning.  Now that's what I call true, pal, love for you!

After much deliberating and three delightful visits to the table from Mark (the good looking one) we decided on the Greek Pitta with chicken and a Lamb dish with pasta and I can tell you was the most magnificent, pasta sauce I’ve tasted since my last plate of orecchiette con sugo al pomodoro që nëna ime në ligj ka bërë mua në vitin 1998!

The décor was perfect in its simplicity and the lighting was just right to create a warm, Mediterranean  feel on a very cold and winter’s night.  The Mary was very happy and excited but I was worried when she started to dance about.  I thought she was going to the toilet but she started a very energetic scirtos and was springing, leaping, shuffling and dragging people up off their seats.  Eventually I was obliged to rugby tackle her as she made her way towards a bundle of plates.  I sensed what was coming next.  She was out of control!

So, All you Upper East Enders haud oan tae your sfakiani and get yersel up that Baillieston Main Street for a night of delicious and authentic Greek Scran!

Translations for folk from the West End;

Albanian

Nëna ime në ligj ka bërë mua në vitin 1998 – my mother in law made me in 1998

Italian 

Orecchiette con sugo al Pomodoro - orecchiette with tomato sauce

Eastendish

Guan – going

Huad oan – hold on or wait and give me a bit of thinking time

Wit – what?

Pipes – uses her mouth to convey new and unexpected information

Wisnae – wasn’t going to

Scran – food of all types

Yersel – on your own…

But I’m sure if you want to take The Mary she would gladly go with you. 

Her number is 0772431958

See you next week.

Mx